How To Write Your Vows
Our top six tips to help you create memorable vows …
Choosing to write your own vows is no small decision. It requires some bravery to be able to make personalised promises to each other in front of a captivated audience. And, of course, it requires some deep thought so that you say the right thing – not always easy! However, they are one of the most beautiful parts of any wedding, and are thoroughly worthwhile! Although we know there are many resources online giving you ideas of what to say, we thought we'd add to them and give you the definitive S I X F O U R suggestions to writing your vows.
Really personalise them. Perhaps start with something generic, and then try and tailor it to your fiancé to make it beautiful. For example, 'the first time I saw you I knew that you were the one' can turn into 'the first time I saw you and your Tom Fords' or 'the first time I ever heard you laugh I knew you would be in my life forever because…'
2. GENTLE HUMOUR:
If you can include humour, do. Be sweet, and don't tease if it's a subject your fiancé would be embarrassed by. But, if you can be funny, you'll have a very engaged audience, and not a dry eye in the house, eg 'I promise to support you every step of the way as long as you continue to kick life's arse'.
Talk to your other half about how long you want to talk for. It will look odd if one of you has vows that last thirty seconds, and the other for two minutes. Ideally your vows should take approximately one minute to say aloud.
4. MAKE IT LOOK GOOD:
The ideal will always be to learn them by heart. Therefore, try to make them short, but deeply meaningful. If you can't learn them by heart (and under pressure, it's not easy to say them aloud from memory), then have them written on some nice card, not folded pieces of torn-edged A4 lined paper.
5. STOP & THINK:
If you're struggling to come up with anything at all, take a break and take off the pressure. Think back to the early days of getting together, and what you thought of each other and how things have changed or deepened between you. Perhaps there’s a memorable holiday that brings out an anecdote, or a funny fact about your fiancé. Cheesy sentiment is allowed, when you really mean it! You can always turn to song lyrics for inspiration.
Practice practice practice. Practice more. Read them out loud and make sure they flow. Don’t forget to allow for pauses so your guests can laugh and 'awwwww'. Write them down with whatever annotation will work for you to ensure that you don’t race through, and so that it sounds like you’re speaking, rather than reading.
So there you have it – our top six tips for vow writing. Most of these tips will be useful if you are writing a speech as well. If you have any more suggestions, or anything to add, feel free to let us know!
R & F